Reflection Rough Draft

Before starting any course for school, I like to make a list of goals to make sure I stay motivated throughout the course. Sometimes I have specific goals but I like to have overall goals to not get overly stressed out.  The goals I made before taking ENG 122 were to give myself time to write and revise my papers. I am very bad at making my do dates on papers so turning my papers in on time was another goal. I also wanted to improve and add on to my vocabulary. The last goal I made was learn to use MLA format correctly. By the end of the semester, I still neglected on turning my papers and assignments in on time. I also still needed to work on working my essays out more. Starting with rough drafts and then moving on to the final draft. One thing I did master from my goals was MLA format.

            While researching the different topics I had throughout the semester, I definitely discovered new information per topic. There was always something new to learn and to read about. I learned how to use my library database and how to work my way around each database. The best part within my papers was getting to write about what I am passionate about. In my essays I predict my instructor would most enjoy my topic and arguments. I argue about real topics that are not typically talked about but are very important in today. The topics are very interesting and easy to understand to the reader. These topics need to be talked about more, which is why I chose them.

I have definitely improved with my web skills during my time in this class. I now know which phrases to plug into research web sites. I also learned about our library having their own personal database that includes scholarly information. These databases also have access to books that I didn’t know of before taking this course.

While writing my research paper I learned a lot of different things. Researching is not my favorite because I would rather write from my point of view. Although I did enjoy learning about different topics and reading about other topics I am passionate about. One thing that was difficult in the beginning was siting my sources. I also had trouble with in text citations. An easy factor was having the information in front of me and writing about it just like that. Honestly I should have spent more time researching over my topics weekly, but overall I think I explained and made the reader understand my topics. I think I could adjust my pointers by having a bigger variety of them. I could also add more sources to my research. Some helpful hints for researching that could be good for other ENG 122 students that I have discovered is not asking a direct question while on research sites. I also figured out that there is a specific section in Google that is for researching and it is called Google scholarly. This section of Google helped me find specific pieces for my papers and direct quotes I needed.

            During my time in this course I definitely saw an improved as a student within myself. I accomplished goals I had, and learned about things I hadn’t known before taking this course. I enjoyed improving my writing skills and adding to my vocabulary. This course taught me how to express myself through my writing and I appreciate it very much.

Improvements on rough draft

3 ways I improved my rough draft

1. I thought my paper was too short and could have added more details through out it. 

2. I think I could add more resources to my paper and variety. For example add different zoos like in colorado and explain about them.

3. One more thing I need to improve on my paper could be adding a counter argument on why people believe zoos are educational.

3 ways my partner can improve their rough draft

1. I think my partner could add more key facts that go along with his points through out his paper.

2. One thing my partner could improve with his paper is giving more detailed examples of certain high schools with improvements on art being added to the curriculum. 

3. I believe my partner could expand on some of his topics for example why did drawing a picture of something in a class he took help him? Maybe with memorization?

Written by: Isabella Montalbetti

Chapter 16

After reading Chapter 16 in my textbook, I understood a lot more on how to do my research for my everyday use. Students usually go straight to using google for researching things, but the best way to research is within your school library. There are databases that hold more detailed information then google does. On the other hand when your on the web and searching in a search engine like google or yahoo there are lots of things you need to know about beforehand. You need to know the accurate word usage. An example of what not to type into google is a question. Although Ask.com is a search engine that you can apply questions too. When researching in search engine you can also come across some non trustworthy answers. That is why its always good to check out different resources and websites before finalizing your thoughts. You should also double check on the date it was posted for current and accurate information. I also learned that a source is comprehensive if it covers a subject in sufficient breadth and depth. 

This chapter taught me many things I hadn't known over researching in the web. I wasn't using the right search engine words for researching topics. I feel more confident, after reading this chapter, to do other assignments I have for school now. I also now plan on going to my online library databases first before researching on google because the databases are more useful then I thought. 

Written by: Isabella Montalbetti

Ethos, Pathos, Logos Outline

https://thatsallwrite.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/pathos-ethos-logos.jpg 

To persuade an audience, a writer relies on various kind of appeals-

Ethos- Appeals based on the character reputation of the writer
S.B
1. We tend to believe people we respect.
2. As a doctor, I am qualified to tell you that this course of treatment will likely generate the best results.
3. Doctors all over the world recommend this type of treatment.

Pathos- Appeals based on emotion
S.B.
1. Feeling proud as your country's athlete receives a gold metal at the olympics.
2. Animal shelters showing abused animals to make the watcher feel empathy for the animals and donate money.
3. A Sousa march can inspire and evoke patriotism

Logos- is the appeal to reason, to the forcefulness of a well-thought-out and well-structured position.
S.B
1. All squares are rectangles
2. An umbrella prevents you from getting wet in the rain
3. Red lights prevent accidents

Video Project

We made a grammar lesson video on nouns, verbs, and adjectives. We hope you enjoy it!

Blog Review #2

Discuss: The blog review I looked over was called “Five Brains Are Better Than One.” When I first looked over the blog, my first impression was how well organized it was. I thought the background was a nice vibrant color, but also not too distracting to the blog posts. Looking at every one’s blog post pictures, I found some that were quite humorous. Making the blog more humorous made the blog less serious. I still believe that My partners and I blog is better then “Five Brains Are Better Than One’s” blog, only by a little. Five Brains Are Better Than One’s blog had a little more interesting blog summary. My partners and I could add something more appealing to change our blog for the better.

Plan: The changes I would add to my blog would only be smaller details. For example, adding to our summary for my blog. My partners and I could also

change up the font to make it more appealing. After that I think that our blog would look nice and peaceful. After checking the blog I made sure all of the blog posts has visuals, included labels, were signed, and that we had a blogroll to our blog. I also like to follow fellow classmates blogs.

Overall I very much enjoyed reviewing “Five Brains Are Better Than One’s” blog. There wasn’t much criticism for this blog, because I really enjoyed how simple it was but still interesting and appealing at the same time.  

Written By: Isabella Sofia Montalbetti 

image-http://sntmag.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/business-blog.jpg

Outline for Hayley's Thesis

Thesis: Social swing dancing benefits my life in a variety of ways.

Example #1- While on the dance floor, Hayley and her partner, thats when Hayley's the happiest.

Example #2- The contests that Hayley enters can earn her money if she wins for school or her future.

Example #3- Ever since Hayley was little, she has felt very passionate for swing dancing.

Example #4- Swing dancing is a great way to get out and meet different people.

Conclusion: Socially swing dancing has made Hayley life long memories. She enjoys everything about it and getting to do what makes her happy. She has gained many friends that have the same passion as she does. Sometimes even wins prizes or money for doing what she loves.


image- http://saswing.org/2013/stomp/KevinJo.jpg

Written by: Isabella Sofia Montalbetti

Logical Fallacy #1

Jumping to Conclusion.

Defined: "Hasty, or sweeping generalization", the writer makes a conclusion when they do not have enough information or evidence. Jumping to conclusions causes people to judge or decide without having the facts or based on their own biases, thinking everyone would agree with them.  

Tip:  Don't think that people agree with all your opinions, and make sure to have a complete amount of information before you make a point. 

Image

Exemplification Response

Exemplification response

After reading chapter 8, “Exemplification”, I understand exactly how and the rules on writing an exemplification essay. Reading about it I noticed that the structure of this essay was a lot alike a basic MLA formatted essay. The similarities are that you start off with an introduction. Within the introduction you have your thesis. Then you have your body paragraphs. Finally, you have a conclusion. Although, the difference in an exemplification essay is that you need a good amount of examples supporting your broad topics. Your examples need to be persuasive, have some interest and clarify exactly what you are trying to say.

In an exemplification essay you need to be specific with your examples. You also can arrange your examples in different ways. One way you can arrange them is by chronological order. These examples will consist of which examples occurred first to those that occurred last. Another way is in order of increasing complexity. This means the examples would begin simpler leading to the more complex ones. Lastly, you can arrange them in order of importance. Starting with the less significant ones moving towards the ones that are most significant or persuasive.

Overall, I can say that I feel very comfortable writing an exemplification essay after reading this chapter. I learned how to use different transitions, how to structure the essay, and how to choose from a broad example to a specific one.

Written by: Isabella Sofia Montalbetti

Just Walk On By

Comprehension:

1. The woman is a "victim" because she is the first person to that he noticed was scared of him and reacted because she was scared of him. 
2. He has the "power to alter people" because of the way that he looked. People got scared when he came into view because of their own judgments of people and their racial profile at first glance. 
3. He walks the streets at night because everybody is scared of him, he says that things can get very "taut".  He also walks the street at night because he is a night walker and he is "suffering a bout of insomnia".  
4. "The making of a young man" - "the consumption of the male romance with the power to intimidate", "perception of themselves as tough guys", "embrace the power to frighten and intimidate", learning to "seize the fighter's edge in work and in play and even in love", "be valiant in the face of hostile forces".  Young, poor, and powerless become thugs because they take all these hints to becoming a young man seriously and end up in trouble.   
5. He attempts to make himself less threatening by moving with care, staying further away from people that seem to be nervous especially when in jeans and not his business attire, he walks by letting people clear the lobby before he returns, he tries to be calm and congenial, and he often whistle's songs from Beethoven and Vivaldi.

Purpose and Audience:

1. "It was in the echo of that terrified woman's footfalls that I first began to know the unwieldy inheritance I'd come into - the ability to alter public space in ugly ways."
2. He uses logic and emotion, which is an appropriate strategy.
3. He seems to assume that his audience is familiar with the concept that black males are often seen as intimidating, but he assumes that his audience is not necessarily aware that not all black men have malicious intent.
4. He succeeded in drawing the reader in, which is what I think his intention for the first sentence was.

Style and Structure:

1. I think he mentions Norman Podhoretz because he needed an example from someone who was not black, in order to get a different perspective.
2. I think his opening strategy is very effective.
3. Staples definitely had enough examples to support his thesis. I think that they are representative. The types of examples that Staples used in his essay were very convincing, because he mentioned in different situations how people acted pretty much the same. He also showed us how the same situations applied to him in different cities.
4. Staples didn't have an exact order that he presented his examples. He did tell us examples that would happen in a city, then he would move on to a year or so later and tell us what happened in that city at that time.
5. Synonyms of "thug": gangster, killer, bully, goon, criminal, hooligan, mobster, troublemaker, delinquent, and gang member. All these words have very similar meanings, implying that people labeled with these words make trouble, commit crimes, and are often violent and part of a gang.

Journal Entry:
I have been in a similar situation as Staples, but I perceived someone else as threatening. I reacted very similar to Staples first example of the women. How she took a few worried glances back and increased her steps until she started running. In my situation, I was with some friends downtown after a concert and my friend said she had noticed a white male following us for a couple blocks. We all acted like nothing was wrong, because we didn't want to show any fear, and hurriedly speed walked to our car. Even today, I would react the same, because you can never be certain of any situation. I always say better safe than sorry.

Writing Workshop:
3. Staples's statement is very accurate. I think he meant that most males strive to be big and powerful from when they are born, but it develops gradually like a romance. Growing up, I noticed many times that the boys I knew always seemed to enjoy playing with toy dinosaurs and monster trucks; things that are known as being big, scary, powerful, and dangerous. That may have been because they were raised to think that men should be bigger, stronger, and more powerful than women.

Combining The Patterns:
Cause and effect is a great way of explaining situations because then the reader can automatically see one of the possible outcomes of the problem.  Examples provide more outcomes possibly and more explanations oftentimes.  We do believe that more examples would have been a better explanation for how a youth becomes a thug.

Video games and violence By: Isabella Montalbetti

Video games and violence

Specific examples:

- kids are too young for certain games
-inhumane
-Brain washing

Forming arguable sentences:

- Many parents don't realize what goes on in the video game they are buying their children.
- Most video games involve stealing, killing people/ animals, and destroying property.
-I believe that video games are why we have so much bullying.

Thesis statement:

The reason why I think that video games are violent is because they are too young for certain ages, they are inhumane, and they brain wash children without them even realizing it.

Blog Reviews #1

Image Source

Kelsey followed: Whatever Frail My Heart Apart by John Scalzi
Rating: 8/10 Great pictures and science fiction writing. The writing is interesting. Some posts seemed too long.

Hayley followed: Mental Floss
Rating: 6/10 There are a lot of great pictures. The writing is interesting. There is a variety of topics that they write about. But they are lacking detail in their writing.

Sofia followed: Underground New York Public Library
Rating: 6/10 It was visually appealing with a catchy title. Not enough blog description.

We (Creative Minds) decided that our favorite blog is "Whatever". We generally like this blog because we thought that it was visually appealing, well written, and there's a wide variety of topics. This pictures posted on this blog made the posts more interesting and realistic. As we followed this blog, we noticed the cover photo changed every so often, bringing a new thought to our minds.

John Scalzi is a science fiction writer. We believe because of this that his posts were really easy to follow and kept us entertained. He didn't make many mistakes with his grammar, so it was easier to read. Although he had great writing, we found that some posts were too long and often lost our attention by the end.

Recently, there was a Hugo award and he wrote about that and books for a few days. His latest post was about a post he wrote ten years ago titled, "Being Poor". He also posts about his cat often, which makes the blog more entertaining and shows his personality. Overall, we enjoyed following the blog, "Whatever" because of its appealing nature.

Arranging an Essay By: Isabella Montalbetti

After reading the assigned chapter, I learned about multiple different ways on how to arrange an essay. With what I read I could relate to what I had learned in previous English classes. An example of what I experienced in these classes was on research papers and a script for a play. A big thing I learned is understanding the parts of an essay. Another new fact I discovered with this chapter was about plagiarism and exactly what it meant. I can definitely see now how important it is arranging an essay.

The main points in this chapter were the introduction, the body paragraphs, and the conclusion. For the introduction it said that it must introduce the subject, create interest and bring in the audience, finally state your thesis. The body paragraphs must have strong topic sentences. They also need to be unified, coherent, and have some key words. During the conclusion you must restate your thesis, back up your main ideas, and review the key points.

In all I can be comfortable knowing all I know about forming and arranging an essay. I can recognize a pattern, form a thesis, and finish strong with a conclusion. 

By: Isabella Montalbetti